Jen and Stefan's Story

Boiled down, this is what we have to say about NFP: It is beautiful.

Jen: We have been married six years now and have used Serena's Sympto-Thermal Method to both avoid and achieve pregnancy. I had my formal introduction to both NFP and Serena at our Marriage Preparation course. NFP was it for us when it came to having or not having babies. It follows a natural order that respects our bodies and our environment.

Stefan: I was already familiar with NFP; Jen even refers to me as "Serena baby"! My parents used the method through the childbearing years of their marriage and they taught it as well. I grew up seeing my parents unified on this topic, and it left an impression on me. For us, we cannot deny the strength of Serena's couple approach. As husband and wife, approaching our fertility together matches the vows we made to love, honour, and serve one another 'till death do us part.

Jen: This all sounds so romantic, we know. But is it really? When you grow together, trust us it is, but be prepared because growth implies growing pains and it is through those pains that have made us better persons: a better husband, a better wife. NFP causes us to look within ourselves and presents us with an opportunity to make a choice that is not just my sake, but also for the good of the other. If we could be intimate all the time without having ever to stop and think if there was good reason to not only say "no", but also wilfully accept it, we would not be who we are today.

We have two beautiful children: ages 4 and almost 2. We'd love a large family (munchkins are a lot of work, but such a source of joy!), but part of our growing pains have been to have to use NFP to delay having more children. At various times, we've had to say "no" to being intimate, and if we were fertile during those times, we've also had to say "no" to having another child. But with every "no" comes a "yes" to something greater. In times of abstinence, we look at our motives for intimacy, we look at our motives for having children or not, we end up looking out for the other, each other, for the good of everyone.

Stefan: If we're being honest, NFP has not necessarily made our life easier, more enjoyable, lighter, or more fun. But that sure doesn’t mean NFP has made our marriage worse off either! In fact, it’s quite the opposite. NFP challenges us in the ways that we WANT to be challenged in our marriage. When we are spacing or delaying children, it may seem like NFP is coming between us. But really, the nasty things that actually break us apart are things like selfishness, poor communication, lack of empathy, impatience, etc. -- all of which are brought to light and challenged by NFP!

Jen & Stefan. Married 6 years. 2 children.